amest i bovvered, forsooth?

(Source: squall-loire)

2 days ago via dejayvu (originally squall-loire)

guy:

stability:

What do you mean most people leave their rooms before noon

What do you mean most people leave their rooms

"WHY DO THEY ALWAYS SLICE THEIR PALM TO GET BLOOD. do you know how many nerve endings are in your hand?!?! why don’t they ever cut the back of their arm or their leg or something omfg"

me everytime a character in a movie has to get a few drops of their blood for some ritual bullshit  (via jtoday)

WHILE WE’RE AT IT, why do people try to cross those skinny bridges over lava/chasms/whatever by walking upright. IT’S CALLED CENTER OF GRAVITY. get on your hands and knees and crawl across that thing. HUG IT. SCOOT YOUR BUTT ACROSS. “but i look stupid!” lalalala but we’ll avoid that ~dramatic moment~ where you almost fall over and die because your damn fucking self wanted to look COOL

(via jtoday)

and stop yanking IV lines out of your arms the minute you wake up in the hospital 

(via panconkiwi)

That is a broadsword, why are you fencing with it

(via gallifrey-feels)

There is a freaking door right there. Stop smashing through windows, damn it.

(via intheforestofthenight)

yes, mr. action hero, I am aware that running dramatically from the baddies at breakneck speed is important, but know what else is important? NOT GETTING SHOT. RUN IN A FUCKING ZIGZAG PATTERN ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT THE MOOKS WERE NOT COACHED IN MARKSMANSHIP BY THE IMPERIAL STORMTROOPERS.

(via pterriblepterodactyls)

Oh, hey, you there, sneaky hero-type breaking into any place for any reason? WEAR SOME FUCKING GLOVES. They’re called fingerprints, dumbass. You have them and you’re putting them all over the fucking place.

(via dawnpuppet)

If something really fucking huge is falling on you, don’t FUCKING RUN ALONG THE LENGTH JUST TAKE LIKE TWO FUCKING STEPS TO THE SIDE

(via takshammy)

wEAR A FUCKING HELMET OBERYN YOU LITTLE SHIT

(via brigwife)

3 days ago via piginawig (originally jtoday)

amor-amore-compensatur:

that’s true friendship

(Source: burpywatermelons)

"Here’s to the security guards who maybe had a degree in another land. Here’s to the manicurist who had to leave her family to come here, painting the nails, scrubbing the feet of strangers. Here’s to the janitors who don’t even fucking understand English yet work hard despite it all. Here’s to the fast food workers who work hard to see their family smile. Here’s to the laundry man at the Marriott who told me with the sparkle in his eyes how he was an engineer in Peru. Here’s to the bus driver, the Turkish Sufi who almost danced when I quoted Rumi. Here’s to the harvesters who live in fear of being deported for coming here to open the road for their future generation. Here’s to the taxi drivers from Nigeria, Ghana, Egypt and India who gossip amongst themselves. Here is to them waking up at 4am, calling home to hear the voices of their loved ones. Here is to their children, to the children who despite it all become artists, writers, teachers, doctors, lawyers, activists and rebels. Here’s to Western Union and Money Gram. For never forgetting home. Here’s to their children who carry the heartbeats of their motherland and even in sleep, speak with pride about their fathers. Keep on."

Immigrants. First generation.


Ijeoma Umebinyuo.

(via theijeoma)

3 days ago via kazzapond (originally theijeoma)
generationfree:

lakilester:

No one get’s lynched for exfoliating is the greatest come back I’ve ever witnessed.

THANK YOU SAMANTHA WOJSZNIS.

generationfree:

lakilester:

No one get’s lynched for exfoliating is the greatest come back I’ve ever witnessed.

THANK YOU SAMANTHA WOJSZNIS.

3 days ago via pasilaly (originally lakilester)
raybucho:

eruditetyro:

pretend

a trillion motherfucking dollars
bitch i will actively be gay for a year

raybucho:

eruditetyro:

pretend

a trillion motherfucking dollars

bitch i will actively be gay for a year

hemidemisplemmyquaver:

I don’t think google gets enough credit sometimes

hemidemisplemmyquaver:

I don’t think google gets enough credit sometimes

You’re your father’s daughter, no mistake. Bloody relentless, the both of you.
It’s a new one today. Lots of tricky words. But I think you can manage.

(Source: rubyredwisp)

herbgardening:

hippie-galaxy:

This is perfect.

YES

herbgardening:

hippie-galaxy:

This is perfect.

YES

(Source: treerings-sing)